Macho Men
by WalkerTRngr
Summary: What does it take to be a Macho Macho Man?


I don't own JAG cause if I did there never would have been a Mic Renee or anyone else who has come between Harm and Mac :)

I know it's been awhile since I've written anything personal stuff had stopped me temporarily but I'm back now and I want to say thanks to everyone who has wrote such great reviews on all my stories. :-D You make writing all the more enjoyable!

  


Mac was getting excited about tonight. Later that evening the JAG office was joining other military offices in the area to raise money for the families who had lost members during the second gulf war. She considered her self lucky because she had laryngitis for the past week and half and had gotten herself out of signing but was the main coordinator of the show. She was most interested in seeing what her husband, Bud, Sturgis, Tiner, the Admiral and Gunny would be doing. They were the only group who hadn't told her what they were singing. Harm had told her that it was going to be a surprise.

"Sorry ninjagirl but I'm not telling. I'm sworn to secrecy."

"Are you sure about that," Mac said as she sauntered up to him.

"No way. I see what you're trying to do and it won't work," Harm said trying to act unaffected. It wasn't working.

"Who me? I'm not doing anything?"

Mac then pulled harm close for a very passionate kiss.

"Wow." Was all Harm could manage to say.

"Feel like telling me now?" Mac asked pouting.

"Nope!" Harm said as he dodged the shoe that was thrown at him.

So here she was with no clue as to what they were doing. _It must be good if they are being so secretive about it._ She thought.

"Hey ma'am ready for tonight?" Harriet asked.

"Yea I think so. You weren't able to get anything out of Bud were you?"

"No he said he's sworn to secrecy. I called Meredith and she said the Admiral said the same thing."

"Well we'll find out tonight. I just hope they don't do anything to embarrass themselves."

__

__

Later that evening

"Okay everything seems all ready to go," Mac told Meredith as she took another quick look around.

"Whose up first?" Meredith asked.

"One of the groups from the Pentagon. They're signing Pretty Women I believe."

"Did Harm tell you anything about tonight?"

"No he's 'sworn to secrecy' as he put it. I've been trying to get it out of him for 3 weeks but he still won't tell."

"AJ either. All he told me was that someone had approached them and offered to donate $50,000 if they sang a certain song."

"Well I just hope our mystery donor gets his/her money's worth."

The rest of night seemed to go by in a flash. All the performances went smoothly and so far they had raised $250,000 not including the $50,000 that was going to be given at the end of the last performance which was slated to come up next.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, This next performance features six men from the JAG HQ office. No one knows what song they will be signing as it's supposed to be a surprise. Here they go."

All the lights dimmed and one by one the guys made their way onto the stage standing in a line. It wasn't until the last man came out that Mac realized who they were dressed like.

Harriet nearly choked on the coke she was drinking and Meredith was literally on the floor laughing.

Harm was the first who came out. He was dressed as a construction worker.

Next came out Tiner dressed as a Native American and then came Gunny dressed as a cop. Bud followed after dressed in fatigues, then came Sturgis dressed as a cowboy and lastly AJ came out dressed as a biker.

Once the music started playing and everyone recognized the song the whole house was filled with roars of laughter.

They six men started out by marching in place to the beat of the song.

Body, body, wanna feel my body, baby,  
such a thrill, my body  
Body, body, wanna touch my body, baby,  
it's too much, my body  
Body, body, check it out, my body, baby,  
don't you doubt, my body  
Body, body, talking about my body, baby,  
checking out my body

Harm took lead vocals as the rest of the guys started dancing around stage.

Mac thought the whole performance was hilarious. Whoever was paying for this song to be sung was definitely getting their money's worth.

Every man wants to be a macho macho man  
to have the kind of body always in demand  
Jogging in the mornings go man go  
works out in the health spa muscles glow  
You can best believe that he's a macho man  
ready to get down with, anyone he can

Meredith couldn't believe that her husband was participating in a performance like this. She never thought she'd see the day. She had to admit, he looked damn good in the tight black leather pants he was wearing.

Body, my body, body, wanna feel my body  
Body, baby, body, body, come and thrill my body  
Body, baby, body, body, love to funk, my body  
Body, baby, body, body, it's so hot, my body  
So hot, yeah my body

Bud slid across the stage on his knees earning some heartfelt screams from Harriet. AJ walked the length of the stage swinging the chains at his waist while the rest of guys stood in front of the mics gyrating their hips.

PO Jennifer Coates was having a great time. Her boyfriend of one year, Jason Tiner, was up on the stage shirtless making an utter fool of himself and she was loving every minute of it. She would be teasing him for months about this performance.

Alright Every man ought to be a macho, macho man,  
To live a life of freedom, machos make a stand,  
Have their own life style and ideals,  
Possess the strength and confidence, life's a steal,  
You can best believe that he's a macho man  
He's a special person in anybody's land.

Hey! Hey! Hey, hey, hey!  
Macho, macho man (macho man)  
I've got to be, a macho man  
Macho, macho man  
I've got to be a macho! (dig the hair on my chest)  
  
Macho, macho man (see my big thick mustache)  
I've got to be, a macho man  
Mucho, macho man  
I've got to be a macho! (Dig my broad shoulders)  
  
Macho, macho man (dig my muscles!)  
I've got to be, a macho man  
Mucho, macho man  
I've got to be a macho!  
  
Macho, macho man  
I've got to be, a macho man  
Macho, macho man  
I've got to be a macho! HEY!

The show stopping performance ended with guys ripping off their shirts and throwing them into the audience.

"Ladies and gentleman we hope you enjoyed the show," AJ said. Based on all the clapping and cat calls its assured that they did. "Now we would like to invite out mystery donor up on stage."

For a minute no one moved. Then a shadowy figure in back of the room walked up to the front of the stage.

Clayton Webb stepped onto the stage a huge grin on his face.

"I believe we owe these men another round of applause... I have to say when I first thought of the idea for this song I didn't even think they would go for it. Of course even if they hadn't I would have donated the money but I thought it would be funny to embarrass these guys a little. So what do you say? Did they earn their pay?"

Loud cheers rang throughout the room. Webb handed AJ the $50,000 check as the men hopped of stage being greeted by their wives and girlfriends.

"So Mac? Am I a Macho man?" Harm asked his patented flyboy smile in place.

"Of course you're my Mucho Macho man. Now give me a kiss."

"Yes ma'am."

So the night was a success, $300,000 was raised and six women got the rights to tease their men for many months to come.

  



End file.
